刮痧

这是我第二次看这部片子。
我记得当年看这片子的时候我还尚小，最喜欢梁家辉带着孩子开车和警察跑高速的那段。
那时候我以为这是喜剧片，这么多年过去，我才发觉它的温情。
我实在看到片名的时候才想起它的，时间隔了太久，我都记不得那些情节，只记得被踩坏的孙悟空和爬窗子的圣诞老人。
于是，我又一点一点地回忆起来。
老实说，我一开始并没有怎么觉得这片子很吸引人；甚至，我一度抱怨着谁谁谁的演技太差而谁谁谁表演不尽如人意。
但是我呢，总是因为一句话就会被轻而易举地打动。
简宁说“Because he's Chinese.”。然后镜头切到许大同扶着父亲小心翼翼上楼的画面。我始终觉得那是无比美好的画面，在昏黄的灯光下，青年和老年的身影交错在一起，被拉长的镜头舒缓而伤感，隐藏在平静之下的波涛汹涌在这瞬间都变得微不足道。
那就是父子。
所以之后我看到许大同背着给丹尼斯的孙悟空要爬上九楼的时候，这种情绪便更加地激烈了起来。
我不想说所谓的文化差异所谓的民族精神，我也不想分析那些站在楼下围观的路人都纷纷有着怎样的心理。
我是只看我想看到的东西。
那是无论怎样都不会被埋没的天经地义理所当然的感情，不要求回报，只有心甘情愿地付出。那是父母和孩子之间不可违背的羁绊。没有理由也不需要证据。
我记得爷爷写给许大同的信，说“吾儿勿念”。
普天下的父亲皆是如此。

  《刮痧》里面，妻子很委屈得问丈夫：“为什么是我们遇上这种事？”丈夫无言……其实答案很简单也很复杂。

  

   最近常问自己这个问题，也常常感叹时间的力量。以前就很喜欢史铁生先生，高中课本里面选到了那片大名鼎鼎的《我与地坛》，那时候很小，不能读透里面的真情和哲理(虽然先扎起还是不懂)。3年后，我大一进了学校，在《大学语文》里又选了这篇散文。原来好的作品是可以读一辈子的。再两年，现在的我又和以前不同了，最起码背上和肩上多了一块又丑又令人难受的疤痕。女生的心态很奇妙，她们会因为身体某个部位的变化而引起心理上巨大的波澜。从成都回重庆，拖着很疲惫的身子，我问：“为什么是我？”精神的痛苦让我从时间里去淡忘此刻，而我知道这一切不过只是暂时的麻醉。可惜这痛苦不是一句简单的“振作！”可以解决的。

   可奇怪的是，明明需要帮助，但我还是会狠狠的推开身边关心自己的人，宁愿选择一个人面对。为什么这样，不是因为不好意思，也不是因为心灵的紧闭，而是因为身边人的存在老是提醒自己，你是不一样的。这痛会被一次次的唤醒，让人难受。所以明知道会伤害，但是我还是拒绝了别人的关怀。

     在这里谈到了爱的方法。《刮痧》里面，法庭要父亲证明他对儿子的爱。爱也需要证据！很好笑。但是人家就是要你证明，因为西方是一个讲究证据的法制。但是爱如何证明？父亲的愤怒让人唏嘘，他护送孩子回福利院，让人恍惚间读出了主人公知其不可为而为之的勇气和决心。父亲的证明是用时间堆出来的，法律没法丈量。只有人心可以互通这样真情。

   妻子问：“为什么我们会遇到这种事情?”谁也不知道答案。时间会消化这样哀怨的问题加叹息，让人忘记去追根究底。而也只有时间能让人的真情洗净铅华，寻找到痛苦的释放点。

  一叹到底，谁解我心，你明白了吗？

   中国人主张“没有规矩，不成方圆”。
   
   中国人自称自己是礼仪之邦。

   其实礼仪，无外乎规矩，哪里没有？只是某些礼仪或者规矩，于一个民族来说，是天经地义的，在另一个民族眼里，却不可理喻了。

   人前教子背后教妻、打是亲骂是爱、家和万事兴。许大同带着这许多的中国规矩来到美国，寻求一种公平竞争。在竞争中，他成功了，如愿以偿，家庭幸福事业有成。他站在领奖台上对美国人说：我是你们中的一员，我爱美国，这里是我的家，我实现了美国梦。然而一转身，许大同却因为深夜里把儿子独自一个人留在家里，并且摔伤送进医院，又阴差阳错地被发现孩子背上爷爷刮痧留下的瘀痕而遭到美国儿童福利院起诉，怀疑他存在严重家庭暴力虐待儿童。在多次与儿童福利院的法庭辩论中，许大同与代表美国规矩的儿童福利院陷入僵局。他们各自上演自己的闹剧，一方拼命攻击，一方歇斯底里。他们根本无法交流。中国人最传统最民间的家庭治伤法“刮痧”，在国美人眼里简直不可思议。他们需要科学的解释和准确的证据。而许大同之前对孩子的武力管教替父受过爱妻弃胎，甚至根据中国神话英雄孙悟空设计出来的游戏，居然都成了呈堂证供。包括他最信任的朋友兼上司昆兰，都成了控方的证人。许大同觉得这帮洋鬼子才真是不可理喻。他扔下一句“道不同不想为谋”忿然辞职。为了能让儿子回家，妻子违心与他分居，父亲内疚回国。

    许大同陷入了绝望的境地。他表面暴跳如雷，固执已见，内心却在深深长叹：美国居，大不易啊。他痛哭，他呐喊。他忘了他已是“美国人中的一员”，也忘记了他的儿子只会说英语。他想回到愿意承认他的感情他的观念的中国。但是他是负罪在身，为了证明他的清白与正直，他必须留在美国等待宣叛。

    为了能在圣诞夜给儿子送礼物，许大同悲壮地从室外爬水管到9楼自家的窗外。然而正在他险些失足坠楼的时候，昆兰和福利院女主管带着法院的解禁令拯救了许大同。而这个结局是昆兰以自身作为实验品到华人街请中医为他刮痧，证实了确实是种家庭疗法而非暴力。
掌声，礼物，泪水，理解，感动，大团圆结局。

   尽管如此，整部电影的基调却是凝重、阴沉的。美国人是理性的，中国人是感性的。当我们无法让别人承认自己的时候，常常会以表达自己感情的方式试图打动别人。法律无外乎人情，美国人也并不一概那么机械那么无情，他们的法律也一样在乎人情，但最终还得事实说话。电影虽然为我们展现了这个事实，但内里的情绪却无时无处不在渲染一种“背井离乡”“寄人篱下”的悲怆与凄凉。这便是中国人极度自卑导致的极度自尊。

   《刮痧》绝对是一部值得一看的电影。倒不是说这电影有多么好，其实各方面表现平平，还有扮可怜博同情赚眼泪的嫌疑。But，这电影跨越了了海外华人在物质生存上的挣扎，进入一个文化差异层面的反思，给观众一个警示：大多数向往国外的人，并不在于那里优越的物质环境，而于那里优良的竞争环境。请注意，西方的人文环境，有时会公平得豪无人情。好在这个世界越来越兼容了，但是，兼容的程度与文明发展的速度是成正比。所以希望别人兼容我们的同时，我们也得学会兼容别人。我们的礼仪里，包括了“入乡随俗”这一条。

Because He Is Chinese: Chinese Immigrants’ Struggle for the recognition of American Society
—The Maze of Different Value Systems and The Disillusion of Those Outsiders’ Daydream

Brief Introduction to the Movie:
  Datong Xu and his wife Jian Ning have been lived in America for eight years; through struggle they have made great success in their career and with their son Dennis they live a very happy life.
Xu’s father comes from China to visit his family. While there, he gives his grandson a harmless traditional Chinese medical treatment of Gua Sha, which the local authorities wrongly regard as child abuse. The family goes through a very hard time when the child is taken away by the child protection agency. Meanwhile, the Xu’s father leaves America because he finds that the living environment is really not suitable for him, as he feels that Gua Sha, which is so common in China is treated as child abuse in America. Worst of all, he cannot converse in English.
Eventually, an American friend of Datong tries Gua Sha and proves that the treatment leaves painful-looking marks that are not actually harmful at all. And the end result sees that Dennis is returned home and the family is reunited.

Movie Analysis: with a focus on pieces taken from the movie
Value Systems deeply rooted in Different Cultures Do Make Clashes
As is shown to us, despite the fact that Datong, with his wife has been to the States for eight years, deep in his heart his root is in China and some of the most fundamental viewpoints of his are still typical Chinese style.
Scene one: at the very beginning of this movie Dennis and the son of Datong’s friend Quinlan have a fight and Dennis beats the other boy, then Dennis goes to play computer games. Let’s see what Datong has done to his son: he shuts down the computer, beats his son and asks him to apologize to Quinlan’s son, an act making the Quinlan family feel confused and puzzled.
Now you see, having lived in America has made Datong look like an American citizen and has gained him a good reputation as an American computer game designer; however, it fails to change his value system since he is brought up in China and mainly educated there. Family structure and their inherent relationships and obligations are a major source of cultural difference. (Xu, page 94) And differences between west and east in value systems occur, thus making the culture clashes: Quinlan never did this to his son, so he can’t understand Datong’s deed and feel quite surprised.
Scene two: at the hearing Datong shows his fury and “overacts” as he witnesses someone saying something bad about Chinese culture, making people present at the court feel so astonished.
As we all know, the curt is a sacred place and no one should be led by his own emotion and behave rudely to the judge, as this is an offense to sobriety of the law and the legal system. Complex as the scene may appear to be, what causes Datong’s deeds can be carefully reasoned:
Here again come the cultural clashes: American culture is so different from ours that they may not be able to correctly comprehend and decode our culture; this has caused the person who has said something bad about Chinese culture at the court misperceive our culture, which is a sad truth. When somebody misunderstands your motherland, what will you do? Of course we’ll fight back and defend our country, wherever and whenever. And this, is the very answer to Datong’s deeds at the court.
Cultural Conflicts and Its Causation
We should admit the fact that this is a movie full of cultural conflicts, among which the different opinions towards Gua Sha and the unhappy life of Datong’s father in America should be the most serious two. Gua Sha, along with the life experience of Datong’s father, can be taken as the two significant factors when we are studying the clue of this movie.
Scene Three: Dennis is taken away from Datong’s family because of the seemingly painful-looking marks left by the treatment Gua Sha.
Here the mark is taken for the testimony that Datong’s family has abused the child; however, Chinese people, as the inventor and practitioner of this traditional treatment, will never come to the conclusion that this is harmful to the patients. Unfortunately, probably no Chinese has thought of the problem that Americans don’t make sense of this treatment; and also, probably no Americans have realized that Gua Sha is not a punishment or abuse but a way to heal people’s illness.
Misconceptions from both sides has jointly led to the cultural conflicts, both sides need to retrospect themselves and communicate with each other, which in the movie we can hardly see. And the movie is the reflection of the reality, though a little unwilling to accept the fact, we have no choice but to face this serious problem: lack of understanding and interaction between different cultures.
Scene Four: Datong’s father, finding it extremely difficult to live in a totally different environment and feeling a sense of loneliness, finally leaves for China.
The life of an old person living in a foreign country is always a heated topic to be discussed. Today I’ll focus on the conflicts part:
The grandfather, symbol of the Chinese traditional culture and the Chinese past, is confronted with modern America and the contemporary American mainstream culture. It is obvious that these two differ in lots of aspects, and of course so many differences are to cause cultural conflicts, in which the Datong’s father is too weak to fight back and have no choice but to return to its own culture.
What has made a Chinese old man face those cultural conflicts? The reasons are as follows: living environment, language, worldview and values, etc. And in all those elements, I think the unfamiliarity of an unacquainted culture should be the most striking one.

Conclusion Part:
American Dream? So Hard to Achieve for a Chinese Immigrant
  Do you still remember the words said by Datong Xu at the start of the movie when he is addressing his prize-winning speech? In his speech he says that if he can keep working hard he will one day become a real, successful American, American as he has thought of is a country full of opportunities and he is the lively example, and at last he says he loves America and that’s his American Dream.
  Sarcastically, the start of the movie turns out to be Datong’s peak, and then both his career and his life have become worse and worse. It is certain that the family is reunited and things begin to become better, but you can’t deny the fact that Datong’s American Dream is actually ruined and disillusioned, maybe through time he will soon “recover”, but the pain left by the tragic memory of this incident is sure to last long.
  In his famous novel The Great Gatsby Fitzgerald wrote the famous sentence: So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past (Fitzgerald, page 224). American Dream is far away from those immigrants, the famous Chinese writer Zhu Ziqing has once said: “but the happiness is theirs, I have nothing.” And this theory can also be adapted here: the American dream is American’s, they immigrants have nothing. Even Americans themselves can’t easily realize their dream, how about immigrants?
  And what has made this? Of course the difference of culture and value systems! To solve this problem, we still have a long way to go.

  The name Datong means great harmony, I guess it is not only the ultimate goal of the director but also the ultimate goal of people all around the world. It comes as no surprise that it is of vital importance to realize this goal, but there still exist a great number of obstacles, especially in the aspect of culture and communication. What should we do? Just keep walking, keep fighting and trying hard to build bridges between different cultures and help them understand each other to fulfill our dreams.
  If one day the great harmony arrives, the world will take on a new look and the earth will make a true global village.

基本上，剧情不太合理。梁家辉作为一个到美国生活了这么长时间的人，连不能够打孩子这么一点基本意识都没有吗？到了法庭上，本来几个词可以说清楚的事情，Chinese alternative therapy/massage，就是不说，光知道发脾气。如果不是有一个超级负责人的法官，这局面怎么收拾得了。要表现文化冲突也要合理一点才好啊。

版权归作者所有，任何形式转载请联系作者。
作者：KyleKKK（来自豆瓣）
来源：//book.douban.com/review/9121153/


很多人看这部电影的切入点都是中美文化差异，记得大学的美国文学老师也让我们就文化差异写影评交作业，但是我看这部电影的时候更多的是思考像主角这些急于融入欧美文化和社会的人的心理，电影讲述的是由梁家辉和蒋雯丽主演的北京夫妇许大同和简宁及儿子丹尼斯在美国追梦的生活状况，他们一家很幸福，过得也很体面，许大同开发了一款游戏同时也获得了奖项，在颁奖时，许大同说：“我的美国梦终于实现了，来到美国经过八年的努力，拼搏，终于实现了美国梦”。
这个时候，许大同是春风得意马蹄疾，他的高兴源自于他觉得自己终于融入了美国，成为了自己梦想中的成功人士。这个时候，注意台词你会发现，夫妻俩对话都尽量避免用中文，说中文好像成了不高大上的表现。这样的心理是个例吗？不是。从1840年起，中国人从天朝上国的美梦中惊醒，我们引以为傲的文化和传统屡屡受到冲击，在西方文明和工业文明的强烈攻势下，很多人产生了文化自卑感，这种自卑感一直持续到今天，甚至还会持续很多年。简单举个例子，现在稍微有点钱从小就把小孩送双语或者英语学校，看爸爸去哪儿里面，很多小朋友开口闭口都是英文。当然我不是批判小孩，我只是证明这种文化自卑感至今仍然影响着我们，改变着我们的生活。
前段时间，美国有个知名美妆品牌因为新出的粉底液供黑人选择的色号太少被各种攻击和抵制，每个美妆博主测评之前都要都要先批评一下这个品牌，如果没有批评则会被粉丝和网友攻击。讽刺的是，这个品牌的官方ins账号曾经公然发“ching chong”内涵中国人，“ching chong”是什么？Ching chong is a pejorative term sometimes employed by speakers of English to mock or play on the Chinese language, people of Chinese ancestry, or other East Asians who may be mistaken for Chinese that resided in Western countries！这么明显针对中国人华人的内容，但是却没有收到多少指责，甚至一些华人或中国人在这个品牌的账号下面代表那些抗议的中国人说sorry，指责他们太敏感太得理不饶人。为什么这些人会这样？因为他们的骨子里有深深的文化自卑感，因为他们对于自己民族的文化缺少认同，甚至认为自己民族生来是低人一等的，那些站起来speak up的人在他们眼里是无理取闹的，甚至是丢人的。
刮痧这部电影是2001年的，那个时候所谓成功的“华人”几乎是否定自己原来的文化的，十几年过去了，仍然有不少人还是这样的心理，1949年，tz说中国人民从此站起来了，但是要站得直站得正也许还要很多年，所幸的是，从1840年到现在，我们的民族从来不缺勇敢站出来的人。